The interview below is one I gave to a graduate student at the University of Texas. This woman has taught me a lot about her experience as a single mother and activist trying to make it through grad school at UT. Her life style is not the most stereotypical student experience. She has to take demanding classes while caring for a child. I got to interview her about her experience and the answers really hit home after all the work we’ve being doing to make the campus more accessible to women and mothers.
–
1. What did you expect to get out of going to grad school/what it would be like, compared to what it really is like?
Well, I don’t quite know what I expected grad school to be like. I think I expected it be less emotionally stressful and more intellectually stimulating. What I mean is, its strange to me that the biggest stressors in grad school are competitions for money that are supposedly based on how scholastically competitive we are. I’m sure I had a romanticized vision of grad school but I didn’t expect it to be this cutthroat. My favorite part of grad school are the professors here because they can really empathize with what we are going through and they don’t make grad school as stressful as they could. It is different actually getting criticism on my work from my professors, and although it makes me feel bad sometimes to read their critiques, I have to remember that they are helping me become a better student/scholar. Due to my professors’ kindness, grad school isn’t as academically stressful as it might be. Having said that, it is difficult getting all the work done sometimes, because I don’t always have the time to do it as well as I would like to.
2. How is it for women in grad school, especially those who are mothers/workers? Is there a lot of support for women and mothers?
I think there should be more institutional support for women and mothers in grad school. I have found no scholarships for mothers or single mothers, and there is no institutional recognition at UT that I have different financial needs as a mother, and there is no attempt to accommodate me. For example, at Berkley they award a yearly $8,000 grant to student parents in grad school. I wish they did the same here. And I wish that I felt comfortable mentioning my status as a student parent and a single parent on applications for funding, because I feel that it IS an academic achievement in and of itself.
Overall, I think it is more intimidating for women in grad school. In classes with a lot of men, I feel very hesitant to talk, especially if they are older. I also feel awkward in my interactions with them sometimes, not because they do anything wrong, but just because the dynamics feel off-kilter. I have plenty of male classmates with children, but I always feel jealous of them because I know they don’t have to fulfill the same domestic responsibilities as me, so they can study and/or relax more. It is the first time in my life that I wish I was a man, because I wish I could have children without having to really take care of them like a mother does (breastfeeding, etc.) I think the university should offer free or subsidized childcare for graduate students. They do have an early education center, but the wait list is 3 years long and it’s not that cheap, either. Childcare costs me $7,000 per academic school year, which is almost half of my fellowship stipend. The other half goes to rent, yet the university doesn’t think that I qualify for much extra financial aid.
I think they that institutions like universities and the state are reluctant to support single moms because they don’t want to “reward” our bad choices and encourage more women to follow in our footsteps. But this speaks a lot about the patriarchal and sexist orientation of the institutions themselves, as well as the greater society we live in.
3. How do you feel being a woman has impacted the classroom experience and your relationships with fellow classmates?
I just feel awkward talking to my classmates sometimes. Some of them are friendly, but I feel that some of them wonder about my intentions when I speak to them because I am a single mom so I feel that they make assumptions about my sexuality or sexual activity. Overall, I have a hard time fitting in sometimes. As far as the classroom, sometimes I feel that the men have an easier time being chummy with the professors, and I think male professors sometimes praise men’s comments in class more.
4. Why did you choose your program specifically? Do you feel that after your experience in grad school those reasons have held true in school for you, or will in the future?
I chose my program because it is the best program of its kind in the nation, and it is renowned for its activist scholars. I do believe these things are true, and I have been really impressed with the program. I just wish they didn’t keep us so stressed about funding for our second year of study.
5. How have you been able to get through school with all of the difficulties of being a student along with the outside responsibilities?
I only sleep an average of 4 -5 hours a night, so I’m always tired. I take little 15 or 20-minute naps while my daughter watches cartoons. My house is always a mess, even though I try really hard to keep it clean because I feel like I’m not a good mother if I don’t have a clean house. I try really hard to focus on my schoolwork while my daughter is in daycare. I only hang out with friends for a few hours per month. I try to prioritize my daughter, and remember that happiness is key and that I’m doing this for her. Finally, I often turn in rushed or incomplete work (in my opinion) but my professors are fairly understanding and they don’t think it’s terrible.
6. What does the university need to be doing to help support students so that there is not burn out?
The whole grad school system needs an overhaul, in my opinion. Education should not be further privatized, so that the university can hire more faculty. Then grad students wouldn’t have to teach so many classes in addition to completing their own academic work. More faculty would also provide more mentorship for grad students and undergrads. This is how it works in other countries, like Brazil. The university should provide stipends to grad students on a need-based basis, so that people like me are able to complete our educations (I’m not sure if I’ll be able to). This would also help eliminate the culture of cutthroat competition for money and resources. Finally, more people of color and otherwise marginalized people should be admitted. I recommend something akin to the University of California system, which asks for a “diversity statement” along with the application to grad school. This would help to correct the institutionalized exclusion of marginalized groups from higher education. I also wish that the state of Texas had better resources for grad students. For example, I need some expensive dental work done, but Medicaid (through the state) won’t give me dental insurance, and neither will the university.
7. Do you feel that being a grad student is rewarding in itself? Is this what keeps you going? How could it be more rewarding?
It is rewarding, because the successes feel very successful, if that makes sense. The progress is just so slow that it feels impossible to advance in my own work sometimes. It would be more rewarding if it were less stressful.
–
New to the group? We will meet every other week at 1pm. People are welcome to attend whichever meetings they can and to bring friends. You are strongly encouraged to do the readings, but we know life happens, so people are still welcome to come even if you have not read. We will try to summarize the readings so everyone can participate in the discussion. We will email out the readings a week before the group meeting. Any ideas for articles, movies, and/or activities are warmly welcomed. We hope to get your feedback on themes and readings.
Everyone is welcome to attend. For location information or questions you can contact us at catscows@gmail.com.
QUEER THEORY STUDY GROUP
How do we negotiate gender, sexuality, queerness every day? What do these things have to do with race, class, ability and other identities we hold? What does family mean to us? What does the struggle for queer
liberation look like today and where does it need to go? And what vision do we have for a society free of oppression?
Many of us have been discussing these questions for some time now. This is another opportunity for any interested people to come together, study, laugh, share stories and continue to make sense of the world we find ourselves in.
Here is the proposed syllabus:
Meeting 1. June 26, 1pm
-”Queer Liberation is Class Struggle” by JOMO on Gathering Forces:
http://gatheringforces.org/2010/01/08/queer-liberation-is-class-struggle
(~3 pgs)
-”Homophobic Workers or Elitist Queers?” by Joanna Kadi:
https://docs.google.com/viewer?a=v&pid=explorer&chrome=true&srcid=0B1g9o3sfn8kjYjhjY2U2YTctNzBhNi00YzFmLWI3NWItOWIwM2RiMWRlNDJj&hl=en_US&authkey=CNruzdMK&pli=1
(8 pgs)
-Kate Bornstein, “My Gender Workbook” Chapter 1-2 (We will begin the
workbook this week, and may continue with it through study group.)
https://docs.google.com/viewer?a=v&pid=explorer&chrome=true&srcid=0ByDIK39mTj6dMjM3YjVkNWMtYzcwMS00MmJlLWE1YjYtMjA5YjhkYWYxY2Ix&hl=en&pli=1
-Identifying key themes/definitions
-Introductions, goals, feedback on syllabus, ground rulers, etc.
Meeting 2. July 10, 1pm
-”Queer Race,” in A Critical Introduction to Queer Theory, Nikki
Sullivan
-Queer People of Color blog selection
Meeting 3. July 24, 1pm
–”The Transfeminist Manifesto” by Emi Koyama:
http://www.hist.unt.edu/faculty/Pomerleau/4260/Koyama_tfmanifesto.pdf
Meeting 4. August 7, time TBA
-Film: “Still Black: A Portrait of Black Transmen and Their Lives”
We wanted to share a dope paper written by a member of ¡ella pelea! on the League of Revolutionary Black Workers. As described by the paper, the League
“…emerged in Detroit in the late 1960s, a period of growing dissatisfaction with the mainstream integrationist civil rights organizations and the failures of the Democratic Party to address the subjugation of black people in a comprehensive way. A new movement which came to be known as Black Power or Black Liberation, grew out of these failures and gave birth to a new identity and a number of new mass and revolutionary organizations, one of the most advanced being the Revolutionary Union Movement and the League…
Catalyzed by the Great Rebellion of 1967, an upheaval of Detroit’s black poor against police brutality, poor living conditions, and limited jobs, the League saw the necessity of organizing black workers. Formed by a core of organizers who worked in the auto industry, they were also instrumental in organizing the Dodge Revolutionary Union Movement (DRUM), in the Dodge Main auto plant and which pushed for addressing atrocious workplace conditions, speed-up, and the extension of the working day as well as their racist implications. Some DRUM militants were a part of previous civil rights groups but were discontented with the politics and took a more radical political stand that contextualized white supremacy through the framework of capitalist social relations.”
There are many lessons to be learned from the experience of the League and this paper takes an important step towards distilling that history for a new generation of militants today!
Thursday, May 5, 2011
7pm
¡ella pelea! & Resistencia Bookstore present
Stepping out of the Ivory Tower & into our communities & backyards:
Autogestionando/Challenging our university experience
Join us for a panel looking internationally at budget cuts to university and public education funding and the effects of those cuts on ethnic studies, students of color and their communities. The panel will feature Ana Elisa Perez Quintero from the University of Puerto Rico, Rio Piedras and Leticia Silva, member of ¡ella pelea!, Austin, TX.
The event will be held at:
Resistencia Bookstore, casa de Red Salmon Arts
1801-A South First St., Austin, Tejaztlan
For more information call 512-416-8885 or email ellapelea@gmail.com
http://www.archive.org/flow/flowplayer.commercial-3.2.1.swf
Thanks to Alan Campbell for interviewing us!
We gave this presentation at the Abriendo Brecha Activism and Scholarship Conference at UT on Feb 17th. Thanks to Matt Gossage of Austin Indy Media for filming and editing!
On December 1st, nearly 300 assembled and marched from UT-Austin’s West Mall to the administration building and finally to the College of Liberal Arts building to confront administrators in response to an academic committee’s proposal to make dramatic cuts to ethnic and gender studies at UT-Austin. Leading up to and following this mass action there has been much discussion within the The Students Speak (TSS), an organization that has formed around these proposed cuts, on whether or not to explicitly call the recommendations “racist.” Some folks have argued on the TSS facebook page and the Daily Texan’s opinion editorial page that to call the cuts “racist” would divide and ultimately weaken a budget cuts movement while others are questioning the personal intentions of the committee members. While we are currently writing up a more protracted reflection on the December 1st action, we would like to elaborate on some of these questions relying on a text that has been central to the ethos and politics of our organizing.
The national picture
The cuts at UT are happening in the context of an increasingly repressive political climate and broader attacks on people of color such as SB 1070 and HB 2281 in Arizona which has legalized racial profiling and outlawed the teaching of ethnic studies, respectively. Before HB 2281 passed, the Texas Board of Education made sweeping revisions to public school curriculum which has all but erased our histories from Black Power to Chicanismo. As of the time of this writing, we have seen a spate of draconian anti-immigrant legislation being proposed in Texas like SB 1070 to build off the momentum of these changes.
The economic crisis which has seen the bail out of banks and lending institutions to the tune of $1.5 trillion is being used by official society to continue the privatization of schools and the militarization of remaining public schools where youth of color and undocumented youth are most concentrated.
The crisis has made idle millions of workers and asked public workers and other unionized private sector employees to take cuts to wages, benefits, and pensions. People of color have fought long and hard for access to these sectors and in doing so brought with them a tradition of struggle that revitalized and deepened working class struggle. With so many people of color embedded in auto and public sector work, these attacks have disproportionately affected them, making unemployment among Latin@s and Blacks, approximately 30 to 60 percent higher than that of whites.
The challenges of the fight
The proposed attacks to ethnic and gender studies on campus threatens to roll back the gains of our foremothers who fought, shed blood, and some even dying to have their herstories as part of public curriculum. The cuts to public education reinforce these broader attacks being committed in the name of an economic crisis and bullshit colorblind, post-race politics.
Such circumstances make the struggles of people of color not only more urgently needed, but opens us up to being attacked as ‘racists’ for fighting against white supremacy. In Arizona they justified ending ethnic studies by branding it “ethnic chauvinism.” With this and other political and organizational questions in mind, we want to share some of the perspective of Steve Biko in his short essay, “The Definition of Black Consciousness.” We don’t endorse all of its politics still if we are mindful of its historic and situational context.
Biko helped found the South African Students’ Organisation (SASO) and is one of the most influential figures of the Black Consciousness Movement. Under apartheid, native Black peoples did not have citizenship rights and many were clustered into bantustans where a native government acted as a mediator between the people and the apartheid regime. While these conditions are not present here and now (though we are undoubtedly seeing an apparent return to Jim Crow-type white supremacy in the US), there are several important lessons to be learned from Biko and the Black Consciousness Movement.
“Being black is a reflection of mental attitude.”
What takes primacy for Biko in terms of defining Blackness is not just the color of one’s skin nor one’s conscious identification with it, but that, in embracing Blackness, it means to struggle against “whiteness” or white supremacy.
“Merely by describing yourself as black you have started on a road towards emancipation, you have committed yourself to fight against all forces that seek to use your blackness as a stamp that marks you out as a subservient being.”
The December 1st action was a testament to such an ethos, that attacks on our history and identification compels us as people of color to struggle against white supremacy. Yet if Biko’s argument is that skin color is not the only determinant of Black Consciousness that is because there are people of color who defend white supremacy.
“From the above observations therefore, we can see that the term black is not necessarily all-inclusive, i.e. the fact that we are all not white does not necessarily mean that we are all black. Non-whites do exist and will continue to exist for quite a long time…any man [or woman] who serves in the police force or security branch is ipso facto a non-white. Black people – real black people – are those who can manage to hold their heads high in defiance rather than willingly surrender their souls to the white man.”
Biko is highlighting the class component of white supremacy–that people of color who defend it do so not because they are necessarily boot-licking Uncle Toms (and historically we’ve seen them embracing forms of ethnic pride), but because they have a vested economic interest in doing so. When we demanded to speak with Dean Diehl who approves of the APAC committee’s proposed cuts, we were instead approached by Dean Flores, a Latino, flanked on both sides by two white administrators, presumably deans themselves. This is a common tactic employed by official society when the subject of race or gender is immediately implicated, to send in officials who will deploy their body politics to deflect claims of white supremacy. Often a form of privilege politics are used to silence opposition and to obscure the very class hierarchy that the multiracial ruling bureaucracy represents. On December 1st, we didn’t take the bait and pointed out that only the Latino man, a “non-white,” was talking, but one who was silently approving the cuts since it didn’t threaten his own $200,000 salary as students pointed out.
“Their intentions are obvious; they want to be barometers by which the rest of the white society can measure feelings in the black world. This then is what makes us believe that white power presents itself as a totality not only provoking us but also controlling our response to the provocation.”
The non-whites’ real purpose is to dampen and ultimately coopt mass struggle, to offer us the appearance of equality, revealing that white supremacy is unable to govern without this multiracial administrative layer.
The totality of white supremacy
Biko tells us that not only does white supremacy subject us to violence and exploitation but that its sophistication is in how it controls and mediates the resistance to it.
“It is the one force against which all of us are pitted. It works with unnerving totality, featuring both on the offensive and in our defence….Their agents are ever present amongst us, telling that it is immoral to withdraw into a cocoon, that dialogue is the answer to our problem and that it is unfortunate that there is white racism in some quarters but you must know that things are changing.”
Part of the discussion around the cuts has been whether UT administrators or the APAC committee are personally committed racists. Just as Biko says that people of color in the ruling institutions are ipso facto “non-white,” they are also ipso facto defenders of institutional racism. This reaches beyond any thoughts of personal ambitions into the realm of social power and is furthermore an attempt by the institutional force of white supremacy to control our response and divert the struggle.
The UT administration’s ability to cut ethnic and gender studies and increase funding for European studies while simultaneously insulating themselves from any claims of racism through a multiracial bureaucracy makes relevant for a new time and place Biko’s understanding of white supremacy’s totality. When the university administration puts a non-white in front of us who tells us his hands are tied and we should form a lobby group, they are showing that they are “the greatest racists for they refuse to credit us any intelligence to know what we want.” Their hope is to deflect our struggle away from campus, to steer it into dialogue which they will control, and at other times to incorporate it into the administration, all which uphold the liberal mystique of democracy.
We are lectured with patience and respect for our oppressors as if we are children. This rejection of both the “white burden” and its “black mission” counterpart (whereby we prove we can be as “civilized” as the white man) as well as the call to “wait until we have all the facts” was our strength on December 1st. We saw that this was the face of white supremacy and that it must be named as such.
Where we gained the upper hand in our confrontation with Flores was in demanding a student-run public forum requiring him and President Powers to attend and answer questions. This is qualitatively different than the typical administration or student government-administered public “forums” which are really just a venting space and to reinforce the appearance of democracy on campus.
Race struggle is a necessary struggle
We are living in a time when it is socially acceptable for police to racially profile, and for historic personalities such as Cesar Chavez and Thurgood Marshall to be erased from our textbooks. It is business as usual for a 10% cut in state departments to translate into a 40% cut to ethnic studies. We are living in a society where white supremacy is the norm. Yet we are the ones called “racist” by official society and by the Right when we openly resist white supremacy.
While some ask how we can have unity among the student body in the fight against budget cuts while prioritizing the struggle against its racist character and while embracing a people of color ethos, Biko responds, “since the thesis is a white racism there can only be one valid antithesis, i.e. a solid black unity to counterbalance the scale.” We can never hope to reach a society beyond white supremacy by ignoring it or by organizing for the lowest common denominator of demands. Such forms always leave people of color, women, queers, the majority of the working class, deferring to the priorities of straight white men under the guise of “unity.” Rather, we see it in the interest of ALL people, to take up the demands of people of color. There can be no class solidarity that abstracts away the real race content of class struggle.
Wow y’all, the Student Walkout & March yesterday was hella powerful! About 300 students walked out and voiced their opposition to the budget cuts being proposed to the ethnic, area and gender studies programs by marching through campus and storming two campus buildings. ¡ella pelea! will be writing up our own analysis of the day’s events, and we look forward to the reflections of other folks present, but in the meantime we want to share some of the media coverage to help communicate the inspiration and strength we experienced in that crowd yesterday!
Protestors Stage Walkout to Fight Proposed Slashes to Ethnic Studies
Photo Gallery, UT Students Protest Budget Cuts
Walkout and Protest at University of Texas Over Budget Cuts
Furia estudiantil en UT Austin
Interview, UT Students Protest Program Cuts
